ADHD and the Memory Problem: A Journey Through Brute Force

I feel that I’ve always had a terrible memory.  That has been the case for as long as I can remember.  For the longest time, I’ve believed the story that I just can’t remember very well at all.  Now that I understand how ADHD has had an impact on my life, I realise my memory, or lack there of, comes down to attention and motivation. 

I’ve learnt to cope, but it has taken a very long time.  The main thing for me, is understanding and accepting that, no, I simply won’t remember.  No matter how important I think something is, unless I’ve written it down, I probably won’t remember.  Incredibly, I now have people at work who describe me as “the most organised person I’ve ever met”.  This still feels surreal, but my mess of lists, notes and storage structure does work.

The quick fixes, that never worked

It is so easy to want a quick fix, but life is never that simple.  I’ve tried all kinds of nootropics (compounds or medications that improve cognitive function).  I remember going through a list of supplements and herbal remedies to see if anything helped.  Ginseng, in particular, just gave me a headache, with no detectable benefits.  I still take fish oil every day, but this is one of the few supplements that has a scientific backing for improvement mental function, especially in those with ADHD.

However, in the end, the only thing that has helped is brute force!  Actually, practicing remembering. 

Along with my other conditions, such as prosopagnosia and aphantasia, techniques such as the memory palace aren’t effective (link).  That is not having a visual imagination, means that any technique that requires a imagining anything, simply isn’t going to work.  I’m not saying those techniques don’t work, but they don’t work for me.

So what does ‘brute force’ memory training look like for me?

Simply put, remembering anything, as long as it has my full attention and I’m motivated to do it.  For me this is learning Japanese.  Not just any aspect of learning Japanese though.  I’ve been trying, and feeling like I’m not making progress, learning Japanese for tens of years at this point.

I feel that I’ve always had a terrible memory. Now that I understand how ADHD impacts my life, I realise my memory—or lack thereof—comes down to two core factors: attention and motivation.

To try and help improve my memory, I’ve tried nootropics and supplements, but in the end, the only thing that actually helped was "brute force"—practicing the act of remembering itself. This is where my journey with the Japanese language began.

The 1600-Day Streak

For me, brute force looks like learning Kanji. I recently hit a 1600-day streak on Duolingo. However, I realized my motivation was often more about keeping the streak alive than actual retention.

Movement and Memory

The theory is that writing using a pen utilizes more parts of the brain and helps you remember. This is similar to how we use movement in coaching: by engaging the physical body, we activate different cognitive pathways. While pen and paper didn't work for me specifically, the concept of active engagement is what eventually led to my breakthrough.

The Breakthrough: WaniKani

The tool that finally clicked was WaniKani. It uses mnemonics and radicals (simpler shapes) to build Kanji from the base up.

By breaking down complex symbols into stories, I found a way to bridge the gap between my aphantasia (lack of visual imagination) and the need for visual memory. I had to let go of the "quick win" and learn to find satisfaction in the slow, rhythmic process of learning.

Conclusion: No Quick Wins

Part of my shift was accepting that I wasn’t going to be reading fluently overnight. I had to learn to have satisfaction with the little jolts of joy when a Kanji simply "stuck." After months of dedicated learning, my memory feels more resilient—not because of a pill, but because of dedicated, structured practice.

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